From darkness sprung to light returned. Yet light was never known before, for light was night and dark the grave. So now, in rising from the grave, I find the dawn has burst its golden rays across my world, and all I once knew is not as I had known.
The shadows haunting depths are naught but richer places for light to seek. The once morose and somber grove now spreads its emerald limbs in welcoming, cool, mossy glades where golden beams dance like fireflies.
I see colors that now transfix my frantic eyes in hues of rainbow light. They pain my eyes, which once knew only the dark of night — the blue of shadows cast by cold bright stars and waning moon.
Ah, the moon… What tender glances once you cast to guide my weary feet. Your constant ebb and flow lit in silver shades the foggy path through wasted lands. Forget me not, yet let me go to lands of light!
Let darkness of our past and ache of of grieving dreams remind us ever of the light we now embrace! May we accept the light as fully as we did the night, each moment filled to brilliant height, where endless dance the golden songs and fair the hands that lead us on.
I was scribbling down my thoughts around living authentically when suddenly the question came up: “Why should I be authentic?” I mean, is it really worth the effort? There is a lot of hype all over the internet these days about individuality and being true to yourself. But is it worth the transformation?
And my immediate reply is: Yes!!! Yes, it is! It’s hard, painful, and confusing. Some days it really sucks—but look at your life right now. You already have these issues!
The hard truth of life is this: no matter how you live, someone will judge, criticize, or shun you. So accept it—and go live your best life!
You wake up every day fighting to belong. School demands conformity. Families judge you for deciding to quit your “amazing” job. Or perhaps you struggle like I did, with fear of rejection? Or people pleasing? I used to be the best doormat you ever did see (I should write about that one day). And what did it get me? A whole hell of a lot more problems. But it also fueled my authenticity journey!
That brings us to a key question:
What’s Driving Your Authenticity Journey?
For me, the motivation came through filing for divorce. I had to step into the role of a single, working mother and could no longer cower at home, being a doormat. I had to step out of my comfort zone, take initiative, and fight for the well-being of myself and my child.
This has been one of the hardest years in my life: learning to stand my ground and hold healthy boundaries. I have had to face parts of myself that are not pretty. I have had to say no to people I loved.
Some days, I wake up and it’s only my mothering skills that get me out of bed to feed my child. But that’s enough. I don’t have to be perfect.
From this struggle blossomed a desire to heal and become fully who I wanted to be. What started as a fight to prove I could survive grew into a love for the person I truly was beneath the mask. I was done living by the whims of the world—I was going to become the Granny Willow I had always dreamed of!
So now I’ll ask you: Why do you want to be authentic?
Take a moment. Really mull it over. Because unless you know your why, you keep finding ways to procrastinate, delay, or talk yourself out of it.
If you’re reading this, chances are—you’ve already started the journey. That in itself is a win. (And if you ask me, this deserves chocolate!)
So now what?
Here’s what it looks like for me.
Each day, I wake up and choose to keep being authentic—and it’s the small things that make a big difference. I can’t hurry the courts, abandon my child, or give in to demands that drag me down. But I can get dressed, sip tea, and watch my child play in the sunshine.
Some days, it feels like my miserable life is dragging me around by the toenails. I barely make it to the market. And then — I see it. A flower growing from the crack in the sidewalk. And suddenly, I remember: I’m still here. I’m still growing. And even if its all concrete I don’t have to be!
Other days, I float. Everything fits. There’s a bird singing when I wake. The sunlight hits the table just right. My daughter is an angel, and life feels possible again.
I find something tiny to be grateful for. I remind myself I can take five minutes to decide yes or no, and I can say NO. I choose to wear the wild earrings! I decide not to smile… And I laugh at the worst jokes.
These little acts are more than just coping mechanisms—they’re rituals of resilience.
Through these small sparks of joy, I’m gaining the momentum to reach higher and go further toward my goals. They are my foundation in an ever-shifting world. Each day I planting a few seeds, pull a few weeds and wait for the storms to blow over.
I have a lot to learn and many lessons to keep learn. But, each day I find small ways to live true to myself and like Granny Willow, I’m learning that authenticity grows slowly—like roots beneath the soil. Every act of living authentically waters those roots till someday our saplings will become a mighty tree.
